Lately I’ve been so exhausted again. Haven’t been like this in quite a while. I can sleep 14 hours and still wake up tired. I had about 10 hours of sleep last night, took 2 b complex this morning (for energy), and have been yawning all night. I had only been awake 8 hours when […]

The Disease

I’ve never felt right having this disease. I have a great life (not without its tragedies) so it feels like I have no reason to be depressed. Well as you know in the past month or so I lost my uncle, the person I thought was the one left me for someone else, and now […]

Numb forever?

I’m still feeling numb. I have barely cried for my uncle or over my breakup. I feel like I was feeling so much that I built a wall so I wouldn’t have to feel anything anymore. It must be my defense mechanism. Ever since I was little I would try my hardest to hold back […]


He’s been dead for over a week now. That crazy week and the service is finally over and I haven’t shed ample tears. Yes, I’ve cried, but every time I cried I used my numbness to reel it back in so I could be there for my family or because it wasn’t the time. I’m […]


Life is unfair. I’ve been having to go back to my doctor every few months to up my prescription. I seem to be doing ok and then realize how shitty I feel so I go back… But that’s not why it’s unfair. This is my 4th family member gone too soon and the 4th family […]


Today I cleaned (some) of my place for the first time in months. I can’t even guess how many it has been so long. This and many other reasons are reasons I never let anybody come over. My mom happened to peek in and see how bad it was and made a comment about it. […]